Bumver Family Diary: What is it like being a new parent so far!

Dear Diary,

3 months old!

It has been very busy during this period of time. After the confinement nanny left, I had a lot of things to pick up and learn. I was so afraid I couldn’t manage a baby on my own. I didn’t have a lot of time for a lot of things. Time past so fast during this period of time. At first, it felt as if I was trap in this time loop over and over and over again. The time loop was like this: wake up -> feed milk - > bathe baby -> pump milk -> feed milk -> pat baby to sleep -> house chores -> feed milk -> pump milk -> pat baby to sleep -> bathe -> feed milk -> dinner -> feed milk -> pat to sleep -> pump milk -> feed milk -> good night. And the cycle repeats again the next day. There wasn’t any changes for the cycle for at least 1 and a half month. I was so stressed and partly depressed as I didn’t dare to bring him out on my own as I was so afraid that I couldn’t manage.

learning cheeky smile

When he was at about 3 months old, everything started to be slightly easier to manage as I got the hang of it. Even though I was much busier because at 3 months old, he craves for more attention from me. He was able to recognise people and hear their voices. We even hired a helper to look after him at home. It was not easy at all looking for the right candidate that fits the job. I went to about 5 agencies and rejected all the potential candidate until I met my current agent and helper.

We hired our helper from JL recruitment from bishan branch. My agent in charge was Adeline. She was very professional and approachable. She assisted me with the interviews, and I was very satisfied with the questions she asked and the way she spoke with our potential helper. Thanks to Adeline, I now not only found a helper, I have also found a friend. I was initially very worried about entrusting my son with a stranger, just like any other parents would be worried about. Now, I can be certain that my son will be in good hands while we get to work during the day. I have my justifications why I have chosen to hire a helper to look after my son instead of putting him at the infant care.

Below are my opinions:

Infant care: I did give this thought a chance. I went to visit a school and I didn’t like the idea of having 1 teacher to 5 infants. Even though they tried to minimise the ratio to 1:3, I still feel uncomfortable. I also saw with my own eyes, a poor sick baby was coughing at the face of another baby while the teachers where chatting away. To them, it was a normal behaviour between babies. I asked the teachers about their protocol if a baby or a kid is unwell. They mentioned that they will only send the baby home if the baby is having a fever. Other than that, the baby is free to come to school. I just didn’t like the idea of the viruses spreading in there. At such young age, I don’t think I want my son to be exposed to viruses just yet.

Helper: it’s a risk and a lot of luck needed to find a good and trustworthy helper to stay home alone to look after all my precious babies plus my newborn. I couldn’t sleep at night Everyday just to think which is the best option. Helper is opening my door to a stranger in my house and I was really worried if the helper will be able to handle my girls and the baby and the house chores. I heard about horror stories that some helpers unable to manage, torture baby, impatient etc. at the end of the day, I took the leap of faith. And i was glad I did that.

My helper had experience previously and after observing a while, I see that she was vert organised and she plan her things very well. She looked after my boy very well and even manage the house chores. Every morning when my boy wakes up and comes out from our room, he would look for her and give her a very cheerful smile. That is when I know, my son is in good hands.

Now that my boy is 6 months old today (yay!). he got his first 2 teeth out! Behind every milestone and celebration, the parents and the helper had to suffer baby’s sleepless nights due to teething fever and crankiness. (mostly the mother suffered because I co-sleep with him). Hahahaha! He is also attempting to stand and chase after the girls. Clover in is love with him as she somethings sleeps with him. He has also started with solid foods and I made the purees from scratch. He has tried banana, apple, pear, blueberry, carrot and pumpkin so far.